Shaking My Head & Smiling: Navigating Blackness at Work and Beyond

This week at work, y'all, I had a real eye-opening experience that left me shaking my head and smiling all at once.This week at work, I had an experience with a customer who wanted to return a half-eaten pizza, claiming it had too much sauce. Still learning the ropes at my new job, I turned to my lead to ask if we could really return half-eaten food. The customer wasn’t having it though, interrupting with a firm "You better return my pizza." Not wanting any trouble, my lead advised me to go ahead and process the return.

So there I am, doing my thing, returning the pizza, and out of nowhere, this customer decides to say: "I wish black people would stop acting white." Now, let me tell you, internally, I'm like, "Did she just go there?" But on the outside, I'm all cool and collected, hitting her with, "I don't know what you mean by that." But she's persistent, like, "Yeah, you know," and I'm just repeating, "Nah, sorry, still don't know."
What struck me most about this encounter was the fact that the customer was Black and a woman—just like me.

Like why do we, as black culture, try to catergorize blackness as acting, dressing, or talking a certain way when we all have different backgrounds yet SIMILAR experiences? It brought back memories of high school when I was often told that I "act white." But what does "acting white" even mean? My experiences and struggles as a Black woman are no different from anyone else’s, regardless of how I speak or present myself.

Growing up in a predominantly white environment, my speech often gets labeled as "well-spoken" by white folks and "talking white" by some Black folks. But the truth is, I am who I am—an educated woman with a vocabulary that doesn’t fit into anyone's box. That doesn’t mean I don’t share the same Black experiences or face the same challenges.

Reflecting on this encounter, I believe conversations like these can help bridge gaps within the Black community, especially as Juneteenth approaches. Recognizing and celebrating the diversity of Black experiences and identities is important. We must move beyond stereotypes and embrace each other’s differences with understanding and respect.

Maya Angelou once said, "We all should know that diversity makes for a rich tapestry, and we must understand that all the threads of the tapestry are equal in value no matter their color. Remember, sis: "In a world where you can be anything, be yourself." Let's keep shining, queens!